here's to the pillars. the bold who have stepped beyond. experimenting with toys that could crush a child. toys that bring a tear to a grown man's eye... giants of vinyl.
the eeriness goes up by at least 36% when you take a creepy-ass figure and inflate it to nightmare proportions. the awesomeness however, also goes up by 36%, so i guess it's a wash. i wanted to shed a little light on these rarely seen behemoths, as most of them end up in the houses of people who are cooler than you. so here they are. from smallest to biggest.
large martin by ashley wood and 3A toys
also comes in chocolate and vanilla.
large martin has been touching down on doorsteps over the past couple of weeks. retailed at $300 and stands an impressive 20" high. seriously, pull out a ruler. 20" is way bigger than you think. there were 5 different variants, all of which rule. thank you mr. wood. you have done it again.
giant squire by jermaine rogers
needs proactiv... look at that sheen!
one of the most quietly disturbing sculpts ever. rumored to gobble souls while you sleep, the giant squire was released last year. only 30 were made, which means you can't have one. but don't give up hope, it's important to have dreams. or night terrors.
dissected by kaws.
[regular sized mono version shown below]
the classic. enlarged to epic proportions. adding to the army of non-dissected kaws companions. the newest 4-footer just dropped for anyone with about $4000 burning a hole in their jordaches. in my opinion, the coolest piece of vinyl kaws has released so far. word is, that the mono and black dissecteds will also make the leap to foster-child size. fingers crossed.
giant dunny by kathie olivas
sweet and terrifying. you will get bit.
not actually released to the public. this 4-foot dunny was done as part of a live painting demonstration at krny. miss kathie was kind and brave enough to show off her talents in front of the drooling masses. i doubt you can buy it. or fit it through your front door. too bad, it's awesome.
salari ika from frank kozik.
...less threatening on a dolly.
sdcc09 saw this guy sneak in the back door. 5'6" tall. he'll run you about $4k and might actually still be available due to his newness. but for 4k, i'd like him to fill in at work for me. which won't happen until his mothership lands.
tiny tom cruise action figure!
comes with real mini-bike!
an official 5'7" or so. unofficially an alien midget. he is actually for sale, but you have to agree to sit in on "auditing" sessions to reach a "state of clear" in the land of buttholes, or some other equally worthwhile activities.
1:1 pain by coarsetoys
still fucking awesome.
already covered this badboy, but how can you not give bloody a little more love? standing a legit 6 foot, he will happily invite you into his world of pain. mark it 8 smokey.
so what have we learned here today? simple math.
start with awesome + make it bigger = mind numbing awesome.
if you're really lucky, santa might drop one of these in your living room one year. but don't hold your breath.